Holiday pic

Holiday pic

Saturday, June 4, 2011

I am a Woman...and the drivers I HATE!!!

Yes, it's true, I was born with the female anatomy and have thus become a woman!!  And, because of this, I can be a bit moody, bitchy, loving, controlling, hurt easily, depressed, hormonal, bloated, emotional and so much more!!  Sometimes, these feelings are all rolled up into ONE, isn't that fun???  And so, I must tell you that I might get a bit moody from time to time and you might not hear from me because I just don't want to deal with people (I know, you are all my loyal readers and I should try and write for you every day...butttttttttt) and somedays, you will want me to just SHUT UP and stop writing.  And so, thanks for reading and listening and dealing with all of my moods!!  And if you don't want to deal with me, than STOP READING...OK???

And yes, I sit here at work writing this blog.  So, I am hoping that when my boss says she doesn't really have time to read these that she is telling the truth.  And if she really does read these than ILOVEMYJOBMORE THANANYTHINGANDIHAVETHEBESTBOSS!!!

Now, as we approach the summer season and we will all be driving more often, I wanted to remind you of some of the POOR DRIVING HABITS several people out there, before you hit the road, expect to run into them and be prepared:

1. JERSEY DRIVERS- yes, they are terrible and they tend to show up every where...even in states far far away (hey, I'm married to one and he mostly agrees with this statement...I think..)
2. MIDDLE LANE DRIVERS- you know, the ones that drive in the middle lane doing less than the recommended speed limit and therefore causing traffic and/or accidents
3. RACE CAR DRIVERS (hey...this is a palindrome...just in case you didn't already know that)- you know, the ones who think they are driving in the Daytona 500 and must pass every one and their mother to get to their destination all while not using blinkers and missing bumpers by less than an inch
4. THOUGH SHALL NOT BE PASSED DRIVERS- you know, the ones who you catch up to b/c they are driving below the speed limit but when you go to pass them, they speed up so that you can't pass them...
5. BACK SEAT DRIVERS- you know, anyone in the car who thinks they should tell you how to drive...they don't necessarily seat in the back seat either (ha ha ha)
6.SUNDAY DRIVERS- yes, they do drive every day of the week but somehow they were name for Sunday.  Maybe it's because they like to take their time and mosey on down the road to their next destination without a care in the world and are oblivious to anyone behind them who just want to GO!!
7.THE MOMMY DRIVER- yes, I am a mom and I am writing this one...we are distracted by everything else going on in the car and dodging flying objects that we sometimes don't pay attention 100%...or we are speeding a little too much on back roads, high-ways, etc b/c we are late, yet again, to either drop off a kid, pick up a kid, or get to some event for them.  I think cops secretly wait on these back roads to pull over the 'mommy' vehicles!!!
8. THE 'I DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE MY BLINKER' DRIVER- Yes, you all know who you are and yes, we can't stand you!!!  Learn how to use that's not a difficult thing to use and really, it's not like you have to chew gum, tap your head and make a circle on your belly while doing's a blinker for goodness sake...use it.  Oh, and don't just slam on your brakes for those turns that you aren't signaling for...please!!!
9. THE MULTI-TASKER DRIVER- similar to the mommy driver, this one is distracted by a business call (yes, it may be on the head-set, but it still distracts you), putting on make-up, eating breakfast/lunch/snack and/or trying to drink coffee and perhaps pumping a boob or two b/c you've left the little one home!!
10. THE ANGRY DRIVER- this is the one that generally does all of the above all while being pissed at the world and all the other drivers on the road.  Beware of finger gestures coming from this vehicle and don't stop anywhere near this person b/c Road Rage stems from these drivers!!

And so, I pray you don't run into too many of these people and I really hope that you all aren't like any of them.  Please have a safe and happy summer!!

Oh- yeah...I guess if you can afford the gas in your cars these days than Happy Traveling!!

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