Holiday pic

Holiday pic

Thursday, December 13, 2012

'Tis the Season...


Wow... less then 2 weeks and it's Christmas.  How in the world did that happen so fast??  

I gotta say, I'm not one of those 'Go all out' Christmas People.  I kinda fly by the seat of my pants and get things done at the last minute.  This year seems to be even more crazy busy then in the past.  And crazy stressful too.  I mean, who isn't stressed during this time of year??  You've got holiday parties, holiday concerts, dance (for us, it's Nutcracker time), shopping, yadda yadda yadda.  

My most stressful thing is shopping...and how am I going to get it all done as well as get everything I need for everyone on my list at a reasonable price... and than figure out how to get my own kids something.  Hubby usually gets the shaft in terms of presents b/c I just don't have it to give... I know, I know- planning is key, right??  But when I am on a week to week budget based on what my take-home pay is, these holiday extras can be a royal pain in the ass.  I know, it's also about what you give and not what you get.  I get that.  It just gets frustrating and challenging to try and explain to your kids why so and so at school got the IT gift of the year from Santa but they didn't.  Why would Santa not give the same to all the kids??  

Sidebar- which also brings me to the Freakin’ Toothfairy.  Shouldn’t there be some kind of guidelines for doling out cash for teeth??  We give out $5 for the first tooth and $1 for each additional tooth.  My kids come home telling me that someone in their class got $20 for a tooth (and it wasn’t the first one).  Limits, people, Limits!!  DJ doesn’t even bother leaving his teeth anymore b/c I also make them write a note to the Toothfairy and he doesn’t think a buck is enough to write a letter…

Now, back to Christmas Season… so, I’m stressed, tired and a little bit crazy.  Oh, ok, a lot crazy but you already knew that.  I just feel like there is NO time to get anything accomplished these days:(

Oh, and don't forget those Holiday Cards..you know, the ones you've been getting since December 1st??  How in the world do people get those cards made and in the mail so early??  Mine are usual sent the day before Christmas (if we're all lucky) and turn into Happy New Year cards:)  If you're lucky, that is..  maybe you'll get them sometime in January as a Just Because card??  Or maybe the picture will be taken, and the cards will be printed but they will never get stuffed and addressed and mailed??  We'll see how this year goes.. lol

And, yes, that other thing called 'Teacher Gifts'.  The mom handling this lovely thing at Max's preschool is asking for $20 from each parent... Are they serious??  I think I was the only one who had a problem with that amount...am I wrong here??  I never was one to go in on the 'group' gift b/c I liked to personalize it, you know??  20 bucks is just ridiculous!! Especially when you do have 2 other teachers to think about...what are they going to want when Franny makes it to pre-school??

Luckily... all of our Saturday rehearsals were cancelled so we can ALL go and get a tree!! Whoo Hoo...

I just can't wait to spend some time together as as family during their break from school (remind me I said this while I'm complaining that they are home...ok??) and perhaps reconnect with each other.

On a positive note, we do have Christmas lights on our house this year (we've been in this house for 8.5 years and this is a first for us).  On a negative note, one of the extension chords used in keeping them lit has broken off in the outlet:(  

Hope you can enjoy your holiday season a little less stressful then over here!!

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Random things you may overhear (if you were a fly on our wall)

OK... took a break.. life got hectic and I kept passing out on the couch at night... so, here's to Not Passing Out tonight before Writing:)

And here are some random things you might here if you were a fly on our walls (and car doors..)

'Franny, get the pencil out of the orange slices..'

'Please put your clothes back on... Now... PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON'

'Go upstairs and get me all of your dirty clothes'   now, repeat this about 10 times and you might actually accumulate everything from the closet, under the bed, in the middle of the floor, under the desk, shoved behind the crib...

'If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all'   that eventually turns into 'Everyone STOP TALKING, Please, just STOP SPEAKING to each other!!'

'I will miss you when you go to work on Saturday'  (as said about 100x every day until Saturday and then it turns into 'I missed you so much while you were at work today'  until Sunday, when it changes back to the first statement)

'Max, stop crying/whining/screaming or you can sit in time out to do it'  (said several times a day... trying to ignore his crying/screaming/whining is really hard... he's really good at it)

'Please walk on your feet from the door to the table, with your backpack.  Do not fall over, do handstands, trip over non-existent things, stop drop and roll, etc while doing it.'

'oh, no, don't climb up there...'

'Get your hands out of your Butt'

'Ah, Franny...don't pee on the floor'  (I swear, I'm going to start putting newspaper down on the floor soon)

'Sit down'  (this is said to Franny who likes to stand on chairs and to DJ who can't seem to sit in a chair while eating dinner and/or do homework)

'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO'

'mom... Mom.. MOm... MOM... '

'He's looking at me... she's touching me.. stop singing.. you're being annoying.. yadda yadda yadda'

'I didn't do it, Not me, I don't know'

What would we hear on your walls??  Care to share:)

Hope you're having a fabulous day!!

Monday, October 29, 2012

An Unexpected Birthday Present..

Today is my birthday.  Yeah Me!!  Another year gone by and I still don't feel or look a day over 29... Lol

About a week ago..on the eve of hubby going away for 9 days, he decides to give me a present.  Now, you should know we haven't exchanged gifts in more years than I can remember b/c we have 4 kids and the things they need are often more important.  Well, at least that's what I keep telling myself.  I mean, who doesn't like to get gifts, right?  Yes, I like gifts, ok?  Tis year he surprised me and got me something totally unexpected.  Totally thought it would be new camera equipment or some kind of new baking thing so he really caught me off guard.  I'm typing on my new gift right now and absolutely love it.. Yup, an IPad..  Totally awesome and am totally loving it..  I am finally the cool Mom with some cool thing for my kids to play on (that is if I actually let them touch it). Got my calendar set up..now gotta figure out which online calendar it will sync with the best..

On another note..in case you all were wondering what to get me (I did say I like gifts..lol).. Here are a few suggestions:

-Fondant.. Satin Ice in any color
-Sugar, flour, butter or vanilla.
-vanilla beans and vodka so I can make my own vanilla extract..lol.. Or do shots while scraping vanilla beans..
-Wine
-A chocolate cake from BJ's..  Totally chocolate and awesome and I don't have to bake it..lol
-Hard Cider.. Not picky..just love this shit..

I'm not a hard person to please..it's the simple things..lol..

And, let's hope this whole storm thing on my birthday isn't an ongoing trend.. Blizzard last year, hurricane this year.  I really don't want anything else!

Hope all my East Coast readers are staying safe, happy and sane tonight.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

MOOOOOMMMMMM... Can you wipe My Butt???

I know...we've all been there, right??  Kids don't learn how to wipe themselves overnight and I think that this part takes longer and a lot more patience than actually getting them on the pot to do their business, don't ya think??

This is what we are dealing with when it comes to Max.  I honestly don't remember the whole teaching phase with the big 2 kids.  I actually think they were those 2 kids in the world who got it on the first shot, wanted to be independent with their bathroom duties and just got it.  But, I'm sure I'm wrong.  I do have a tendency to have some CRS (Can't Remember S@%T) moments a lot more often these days.

Max is 4.  Max should be learning to do this.  But...and I know I'm the guilty one...it has been far easier and more efficient if I just go and finish the job for him.  I'm finding that the little 2 kiddies are not as independent as their elder siblings and I am probably to blame for that.  Again, it's far easier and much faster to just do things for them (we also have problems with Max putting on his own shoes and getting himself dressed... especially after the whole pooping process).  There are usually a million and one things going on and in order to get us out the door that much faster, I just do most things for him.  Guess that kinda has to stop, huh??

Max is also back in pre-school and this time around he is definitely 100% potty trained.  Although...he still strips down to his b-day suit while on the pot...  I did warn them at the school that he likes to do this but I am really hoping he realizes he can't strip to poop in school...  Wouldn't that be a nice memory for his teachers if he came waltzing out of the bathroom in the buff, looking for someone to 'help' him back into his clothes??  Yeah...so...we are working on the independence issues with him.

I promised him I would make a sticker chart for the bathroom.  That was a week ago.  Slacker Mom has entered the building again and it has not yet been produced.  The poor kid has been wiping his butt (with Mommy coming in after to make sure it's all gone) and getting himself re-dressed and keeps wanting his stickers.  Gotta get it made and up soon or he's gonna think it's never coming and regress to just making Mommy do it.  I wouldn't want to have a stand-off with this kid...he'll just keep calling and waiting until you do what he wants you to do...seriously!!  But, it's not like they have charts on-line for Wiping Butt and Getting re-dressed, right???  Oh wait...as I sit here and write this, I suddenly remembered that I might have a 'chart' of sorts already created on this computer:)  ha ha   See how this Mommy Brain works??

Gotta go make the chart:)
A. Wipe Butt
B. Putt my clothes back on
C. Wash Hands
D. Wipe down toilet seat under my seat that has pee all over it b/c I just let it all go at once...
E.  Hmmmm...what else should I put on this chart??  ha ha


Have a great night everyone!!

Monday, October 22, 2012

A Weekend Away...And a Fresh Perspective

Some of you may  know already...and some of you may not... but I went away last weekend all by myself.  Yes, I know, you are thinking 'how nice to get away for a few days to relax', right??  Well...not exactly.

Yes, I was able to drive 836 miles all by myself (and that's only 1 way) with enough cake batter and frostings packed away in coolers for 200 cupcakes.  Oh yes, I did.  And then, I was able to bake those 200+ cupcakes without little ones underfoot for an entire day.

 Though, I did manage to visit the nail salon and attend a rehearsal dinner.  I also managed to put together a small wedding cake while I was at it:)
Now, I also got to go to the wedding too...  wouldn't it have been silly if I drove all that way and didn't even go to the wedding??  And, I got to catch up with some relatives that I haven't seen in about 8 years..  AND, one of the guests asked me how much it would cost to come out again in a few years and make her son's (or maybe daughter's...don't remember) wedding desserts..lol...

Oh, and then I got to get in the car and drive all the way home (took 2 days for the drive home) and have my bank card # stolen somewhere along the way  (no worries... we were lucky and the bank noticed something was up.. our money has already been recouped).

Now, I've been away from my kids before...not often, but it has happened.  And when I do get to go away, it's usually for a family function such as a wedding or funeral(though, BF...before Franny... I did manage a trip out to CA to visit my brother).

I don't know if I'm growing up or maturing into motherhood but I really was kinda sad to leave them all behind and I missed them.  Never thought you'd hear me say that, did ya??

Some of us are born and ready to be mothers and some of us are not.  I admit that I was not 100% ready to be in a committed relationship with my children.  I know, I'm a good mom to them.  I'm the best mom I know how to be at every step.  Lately, I feel like I am ready to be that 100% kinda mom.  I know, it's only taken me almost 10 years to get here... but let me tell you a little bit about the past 10 years, ok??

DJ was born.  DJ was not a 'good' baby in the beginning.  He had a great set of lungs and used them nightly from about 7pm until about 7am... he also didn't sleep/nap regularly and he nursed every 1.5 - 2 hrs.  I was very tempted to call work and ask if I could shorten my maternity leave just so I could get a break from him. Don't read this the wrong way here...I love him very much... he was a tough baby.  And during all these sleepless nights, we somehow manage to get pregnant with Kyra.  My brain didn't know what to do with that information and failed my mental stability... became a bit depressed, lacked focus on tasks that needed to be done, lost my patience with hubby way more than was reasonable, etc.  But, we got through that and she was born..  And she was a Phenomenal Sleeper and a normal eater!!  Whoo Hoo

A little over a year after she was born, my dad was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.  So, again my brain could not solely concentrate on my children...it was a bit pre-occupied.  About a year after he was diagnosed, we were pregnant again.  But it was a pregnancy we weren't expecting.  Issues with the baby (I won't go into details here... maybe another time...it's a rough one to talk about) and other things led us to decide on termination.  Hardest decision of my life thus far.  That was in December.  My father passed away 5 months later.  Yup...head still not focused on children...

But, we got through all that and we still managed to have Max about a year and a half later (I was 6 mos. pregnant while we were in Ireland for my dad's 1 year mass).

And so, we trudged along and started to get in a groove and BAM... find myself prego again.  Only to miscarriage...we talk about it and decide that maybe we should go ahead and have another...I mean, what's 1 more, right??  Prego again...super psyched...miscarriage again.  OK...more talk and more talk and we finally decide that maybe it's not in the cards for that 4th.  I did mourn the loss of those babies as well as the 'never gonna have another one' feeling. I gotta admit, I was kind sad about that.  But again, plans change and accidents (or 'meant to be's') also happen b/c Franny did make it into this world and into our family.

After 2 years of Franny (AF- after Franny) and our crazy hectic schedule, I do believe I am getting my Mommy Groove on.  I am wanting to be with them and there for them in ways I never was.  I am a different Mom to Max and Franny then I was to DJ and Kyra.  They will probably be in therapy b/c of it, right??  I guess it doesn't really matter b/c don't we all need a little therapy b/c of our parents??

I think the point I'm trying to make here is that I went away, I missed my kids like I never thought I would, and I want to be The BEST Mom to them!!  I know I'm not perfect, but nobody is.  We all make mistakes, we learn from those mistakes and we move on from there.

Will I still yell??  Of course.  Will I still need a break from them??  Absolutely.  Will I still write about all the crazy shit they do so you all can get a good laugh??  You got it!!

I've always loved them.  Never a doubt in my mind about that.  But, I just feel different...does that make sense??  Or do you all just think I'm the crazy one here and why the hell doesn't she know how to feel from day 1??

If you've made it this far (thanks for sticking it out...I know it was a long one), I've got some other news!!  Because of you and everyone you've passed me on to, this Blog was #6 in the Circle of Moms Top 25 NY Bloggers list!!  I'll say it again- You All ROCK!!!

Peace

Monday, October 1, 2012

Just another day in Paradise...

Ahhhhh, the peaceful life of being a stay-at-home momma (ok, so I'm not just a SAHM...but most of the time..lol) continued today.  NOT...

Morning was pretty peaceful...unless you count the emptying of all the shoe bins, the little kid book bin, the little kid toy basket and many other emptying activities..lol...  the afternoon, now that's another story.

Baby C (the one I watch) was peacefully sleeping and I put on a movie for my two so I could possibly make lunch and eat it???   Made them some popcorn and they snuggled together on the couch under a cozy blanket (see exhibit A below)
I'm in the other room and have successfully heated up my lunch and was just about to dig in when Franny strolls in with some markers in her hand.  I think Kyra has an endless supply of markers in every single bag of hers...and Franny has a knack for finding these markers...  don't you just love her artwork??  (see exhibit B)
So, I manage to get the markers out of her hands and go into the playroom to find more markers and put them far far away from her little grasping hands when I discover the room has been overtaken by popcorn... yup, ALL OVER the couch and newly clean floor.  Sorry, no picture of this, I was on autopilot trying to get it cleaned up.  I think Franny loves it when I run the vacuum cleaner so she gets stuff all over hoping that I will have to bring her out again.  She was in the room with me, running around me and my 3rd arm (vacuum) at the beginning.  Yeah...didn't really notice she had left...  But, all of a sudden I glance into the other room and see 2 heads looking at my laptop...  jeez, when will I learn to ALWAYS...ALWAYS put the lid of that damn laptop down when I walk away???  Even if it's just for a few seconds b/c those few seconds often turn into a few minutes which turn into a few hours...  So, here is exhibit C... more missing keys... am thankful I dropped Spanish 5 in HS and went with a typing class instead...lol
Here is another of our wonderful mess (this is the 'little' kid toys)...  we also had the couch cushions off and every single Large coloring book pulled out but my photo abilities were declining as my eye was twitching uncontrollably...

With all this going on, I still managed to empty the dishwasher, fill it with last nights dishes (and wash those pots/pans), make some iced-tea, get 2 complete loads of laundry done, sweep the dining/kitchen area and throw out some toys...  And they wonder what we do all day!!!  

Now... big kids get off bus and I feed the always hungry mongers some grub and send'em outside to let out their energy.  They decided that a leaf pile needed to be made and said leaf pile needed to be jumped in...  they sure did have fun!!  BUT... getting them back inside, fed, bathed and homeworked was quite the task..  HW for DJ tonight took over 2 hours...  must must remember to get HW done first.  I always forget about the aftermath and think he should just go out and have fun while he still can and while the weather is still good...  ooooof...  not fun!!

Here are some of my favorite pics from the leaves (didn't think I'd get my 'leaf' pile pics this year... busy busy)





Hope you're having a GREAT day!!!

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Do your kids....

You all know I have crazy kids, right??  And we all know they take after their dad, right??  lol...  Thought I'd see if maybe (maybe) your kids might do some of the same things mine do.. ha ha ha... ok, mine really don't do this stuff, but they might one day...

- Burp and Fart at the dinner table and think it's funny even though you've told them about a million times we don't do that...

- Randomly strip and drop their clothes all over the house

- Poop in the toilet and NEVER flush

- Laugh at the little ones when they start smearing yogurt on the table, their face, basically all over... instead of saying, No no, that's not what we do with yogurt..

- Lose their shoes on a daily basis... even though they have bins for their shoes to go in and you constantly telling them to put them in them.

- Expect you to wait on them hand and foot so that they are pretty much finished with their dinner by the time you get to sit down and eat your cold food

- Lose socks  (actually, I think mine eat their socks...but that's another story)

- Spill drinks... pretty much every night...

- Tell the little kids to do/say things they shouldn't be doing/saying so that the little ones get in trouble and they can laugh at them

- Use toys in ways they were not intended to be used

- Jump on the couch, pull off the couch cushions and jump on that part of the couch, jump from couch to said cushions on the floor, etc

- Run across couches in someone else's house during a party

- Put younger siblings in play vehicles and push them down the hill

- Drop dirty clothes about 1 inch in front of the dirty clothes basket

- Wipe their noses with their sleeves...even the big kids... I know, gross!!

Like I said, my kids are perfect little angels and they don't do ANY of this crap...  seriously!!!  And if you believe me, I've got a bridge to sell ya:)

Hope you're having a fabulous day.  And don't forget to let me know what your favorite blog post is:)

 

Monday, September 24, 2012

Feedback wanted...

Hi all-

Just wanted to take a quick moment to get some feedback from you... what you like to hear about and/or not hear about..

Also- wanted to know what's your favorite blog entry so far... i have to pick a few and I know what some of my favorites are, but am curious to see what were yours:)

Hope you are having a GREAT monday!!  Kind of an oxymoron isn't it??

New Post coming soon!!


Thursday, September 20, 2012

Random Things (S&@T) I Think...but don't actually say

This is gonna be a total stream of conscience entry... keep up if you can..lol

Oh crap, Baby C is awake already...dude, sleep a little bit longer... these naps really don't want to get shorter...Please??

Come on Franny, I know you want to lay down and rest for a bit..just a little snooze so I can breathe..  you know you want to!!

A poop, seriously?? I just changed your diaper... are you kidding me??  (always happens when I'm on a diaper budget b/c we need more..)

Oh Man, I completely forgot about PTA meeting and now I kinda really should jump in the shower..  where am I gonna lock these kids up so I can get it done??  Though, I wonder what people would say if I showed up in those yogurt stained sweat pants I've been wearing for 2 days and a hat covering my greasy mop with random bits of food stuck in it??

Go ahead and hit her back/throw a car back at her face/bite her back... in response to Max telling me what Franny is doing...

Didn't see the wall while you were running with your head turned around, didn't ya???

Please stop learning new things... pretty please?  You don't need to know who to unscrew bottles later in life, have someone else do it for you...

NOOOOOOOOO, I don't want to kill the bug and hear it go pop in the paper towel... (isn't this what husbands are for??)

Stop crying you little shit..it's only homework.  It only gets worse from here!!

Another spill??  Really??  Can't you just go through 1 meal without spilling your drink??  Come on...do we need to give you all sippy cups???

Pick up you F@$*(#G laundry... do you not see that your F@$*(#G basket is an inch from where you dropped your dirty clothes??

GO AWAY... Mommy's in the middle of playing Song Pop and I really don't want to lose another one...

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO  (oh, wait, I do say this... A Lot... probably too much...)

Wipe your own butt!!  and/or Change your own F@$*(#G diaper you little spawn of satan!!

Did you Ever Want to

See if that duct tape will keep them still and perhaps in 1 spot for longer than 2 seconds??

Tie your children to the roof so you can have a nice peaceful drive (especially LONG ones)??

Let them cry in the crib when they wake up b/c you just weren't ready to go get them yet?? (ok, I admit i've actually done this...but no longer than 10 minutes...)

Give them some Benedryl to see if it will actually make them sleep a little??  (ok, we did this 1x with DJ when we had a really long flight and he was a bit much at the young age of 20 mos... the other passengers can thank me now..come on, it's not too late)

Yell at the top of your lungs in the middle of the yard until you felt better??  I wonder if this would actually help??

Shake them silly to see if you can knock some sense into them??

Lock them ALL (yes, all 4) in a padded room and play elevator music non-stop to see what they'd do to each other??  Hmmmmm.....

Laugh at them just after you've yelled at them or made them take a time out and they scream/cry/stomp all the way up to their rooms... OK, I do laugh but only after I make sure no other kid is watching me and if they are up my butt, I run into the bathroom to let it out!!


Do you Ever:

Get them in the car a little early, make sure they're buckled, close the doors and Run around the car several times to get a break??  Ok, so I smoke a cigarette (I know, bad habit..don't judge) but maybe running around the car is your thing...

Call them by everyone else's name (even your childhood pet's name) before you remember what you should be calling them??  (and they want us to remember the names of neighbor kids, classmates, dance mates, teammates, etc... yeah, sure...wear a name tag!!)

Bribe them with a prize or money??  I just bribed DJ/Kyra to clean up the little people's latest mess of the day (it was a big one) with a prize from the prize bin.  Bad Mom... but, seriously, don't judge..

Not spend enough time with each kid??  (I hate this... so hard to find the time to give that individual attention to all 4 of them...especially with mine and hubby's different work schedules)

Take a step outside just to breathe??

Make up an imaginary grocery shopping need just to get away the minute hubby walks in the door??

Sneak in a treat (like a piece of chocolate or french fries) while they are preoccupied so you don't have to share??

Eat your lunch in the bathroom so you can actually sit and chew rather than share and/or take a bite and have to rush up to go pull a child off the table, pull a child off another child, change a channel, read a book, sing a song...you know, everything they want you to do when they see you...

Feign a headache at night and/or 'women' troubles.. lol

Pick a family picture to blow up based on how good you look??  Really doesn't matter who else is actually looking at the camera and/or smiling, right??

Take a wash cloth and wipe them down b/c you just don't have the energy for a full bath/shower??  Or, you just ran out of time to get them 'clean' before the babies go to bed..  OK, so sometimes, I just hose them down before they come in...seems to work... lol    Note to HUBBY- must get these bathrooms situated so showers can happen downstairs...  oh, and that would mean my washer/dryer would be on the same floor so could we speed this up already!!  Geez!!

They really are worth it all!!  I think...

OK... I think that's enough for one night!!  In the end, it really is all worth it.  I hope it's worth it... and the little shits better take care of me when I can't wipe my own butt, forget who they are, and refuse to eat what they're serving me..

Hope you are all having a Great night.  We have a crazy busy schedule this school year so I am still trying to adjust to it all.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Happy Freakin' Anniversary

Yes, folks, it's my wedding anniversary today.  11 years and counting... WOW...  can't believe we've made it through 11 years and we are both still standing.  OK... some nights we are both still standing and other nights one or both of us are NOT... lol

I woke up this morning a little pissed at my husband.  I know, I know... when we decided to take the plunge and live the rest of our lives together, we promised NEVER to go to bed ANGRY.  He wasn't angry at me and I'm sure he didn't know that I was pissed at him...so that's on Me.  I stewed about it for a bit and then I thought about it and then I came to a conclusion about us...and what's going on lately:

We are both going through life at our own pace and learning things about ourselves and trying to improve things at our own pace.  I am at a completely different place with who I am and who I want to be...  I am finally realizing (yes, being honest here...) that my children should be my #1 focus and doing anything to make them Better People should be my #1 priority!!  Does this mean that I've been a horrible Mom over the past 9.75 years??  I don't think so.  It just means that I raised my kids a different way and now I want to go in another direction.  I was the Best Mom that I knew how to be...BUT... now I want to be a Better Mom!!  I want to put aside that TV show and spend a few more minutes listening to my child's day or reading a book with them.  I want to make sure they have everything packed and ready to go for the next day...including any after school materials we will need for activities.  Yes, this instead of running around like a crazy lady in the morning trying to get everything ready.  I want to be a bit  more organized this year.  I am not awake every 2-3 hours to nurse a baby and I am not sleeping on the couch with her anymore either.  So, I should be able to focus a bit more, right???

I also should NOT get angry at my hubby b/c he's not at this step yet.  We all change and grow at our own pace and we shouldn't get angry when the other isn't right there with us, right??  Especially when you don't tell your spouse what you're trying to do.  As I've said before, I lack a certain quality called Effective Communication... especially when dealing with the spouse.  And yet, we've still made it 11 years!!

Now, I also know that I am no saint.  I have my ups and downs and I have my unreasonable expectations (you know, like the ones where I expect the dishes to be done while I'm away...lol).  I can also be a bit of a Bitch at times..ok, so I can be a bit of a BIG Bitch at times.  Hey, some of you are born happy while some of us are born Bitchy, right???  Right???

It's just time, for Me, to start being a better Mom...that's all.  Maybe I also need to just accept the spouse for who he is and move on, no??  He is who he is and who am I to tell him to change too...  I'm not gonna sit here and tell you all what a fantastic person he is and that he's my soul mate and all that BS about how much I love him and can't get along without him.  Because, quite frankly, we don't have a perfect marriage.  We fight, we yell, we get angry... but, we also love each other and yes, we do kiss and make up.  It's just not a hunky dory perfect life.  There are ups and downs...and we've weathered them together.  And, I guess, that's the important part, right??  I mean, they don't call it make-up sex for no reason...ha ha ha... TMI??

What's up next:
Franny vs Puppy  (just tweaking this one... coming soon)
Not just a stay at home Mom
Whatever else I can think of...lol...

Hope you are all having a great night..  If you want to read about what we were doing 11 years ago, feel free...  here are the links to my 'Night Before' and Night of'...

http://honestfamilyliving.blogspot.com/2011/09/10-years-ago-part-1.html
http://honestfamilyliving.blogspot.com/2011/09/10-years-ago-part-2-then-and-now.html


Thursday, September 13, 2012

I admit it...

We were walking out of CVS today, and Max has both hands down his pants (in the back) and I tell him to get his hands out of his pants.  But Mom, he says, I'm scratching my butt!!!

Hmmmm... that's interesting, right??  I mean, wouldn't you like to just scratch that itch whenever you wanted to??  How weird would we all be if we just went ahead and put our hands down our pants to scratch all those itches??  Now, I know some people actually do it..you know, whatever they want wherever they are (just walk around Walmart and you'll see), but I usually reserve scratching my butt for the comfort of my own home..lol

It also got me thinking about some other things I do...and I'm going to admit to you what they are... hope you don't think any less of me:)

1. I don't take a shower every day.  I am really lucky when I get that 2nd shower in for the week... you did see what Franny did in the playroom, right??  (and yes, that was pee soaked diaper filling you saw)

2. Sometimes, I leave the house forgetting to put deodorant on... sorry... it happens  (this is why I carry an extra in my purse)

3. I sometimes forget to brush my teeth before rushing out of the house... but, alas, I also carry one of these in my purse  (ever wonder why my 'purse' is so big??)

4. My upstairs hasn't been fully cleaned in so long I can't remember when it was done... so, don't go up there if you ever visit

5. Sheets are the last thing I think about when getting things organized, vacuumed and all around cleaned up..  so, that doesn't happen as often as it should...

6. After dinner, I don't sweep my floor... I wait until all those food bits have dried a bit and sweep them up then (especially the corn and rice that are really hard to sweep when not dried up) .. but don't worry, I've gotten into a daily sweeping routine...  (I also don't pick up all the bits of play-do until it is completely dry and can be swept up easier)

7. I watch stupid reality shows

8. I steal wine glasses  (don't worry, I've never taken them from someone's home..promise..) .. oh, but I do steal the long spoons from Friendly's... please, feel free to turn me in so that I can maybe spend a night in jail and get some rest...lol

9. I scratch my ass and pick my nose (but only in the comfort of my own home when no one else is around)

10. I don't always listen to what my kids are saying .. I know, I really should.. but sometimes it happens

11. I forget to make my kids brush their teeth some days... especially in the summer... I know I know, make them kids brush

12. I fart sometimes in the grocery store and walk away.. it must be my Nana in me but it also helps to be there with kids so people don't know it's me.. gross, right??

13. I sometimes go days in the same clothes.. especially if I am going absolutely no where.  It's not like I'm showering every day, right??

14. I've broken some promises to my kids.  Not a good feeling and I really try not to do it if I can help it..

15. I throw temper tantrums.  Yes, I still do.. especially when hubby doesn't do what I only think in my mind he should be doing and I didn't leave a very detailed note explaining everything he should do while I was gone.. These tantrums include slamming cabinets, kicking toys out of the kitchen, throwing the dish towel, etc

16. I have bitchy tendencies.  And sometimes my bitchiness/sarcasm can come across the wrong way..sorry to those that misunderstand.  But, it's who I am... trying to change this one.  Especially when I hear the way Kyra talks sometimes..makes me re-think how I should be talking to hubby and yes, to them.

17. I've been known to leave the laundry in the washing machine for days before I remember that they never made it to the dryer..  I also have tendency to take said clothes out of dryer (when they finally make it there) and leave in baskets w/o folding it for days...

18. I make and break the 'no eating in the playroom' rule...  it's like a cycle..

19. I let my 8 yr old take my almost 2 yr old outside to play while I attempt to do some kind of cleaning inside..  hey, I'm training her for the future of babysitting...she can even change a diaper...

20. I drink a glass of wine just about every night.  Does that make me an alcoholic??  I don't think so... but it's my quiet ritual after they are all in bed!!

21. I like the Dixie Chicks..and Air Supply.. and Celine, Kenny Rogers, Les Miserables, Journey and a little Green Day.. ha ha..  oh, and I used to listen to the Cabbage Patch Kid record ALL the time (I can still sing some of those songs)

22. I've accidentally peed my pants (and yes, the other one too...think traffic jam, 3 kids in the car and dash to the rest area bathroom and no other adult with you).. especially when I drank too much coffee (or beer/wine/liquor) and just couldn't get there fast enough..  haven't you??  This could also randomly happen if I'm jumping around dancing or doing some of that Zumba crap... these are the times I wished I actually did those kegels they kept telling us to do when we were pregnant..  things just aren't the way they used to be..

23. I have chin hairs and I pluck them.  What else are you supposed to do with them, right??

24. I'm watching Honey booboo right now while I'm writing this.  Horrible show but it's one of those that you turn on and can't turn off b/c it's soooooooo horrible, ya know??

25. I'm addicted to my Facebook games:)

OK, I think that's about it.  Do you have any admissions??

On a completely different note- I want to thank you all for your votes and continued support!!  The votes are finalized and I have made it into the Top 25 Blogs in NY for the Circle of Moms!!  I am thrilled!!  Thank You!!


Sunday, September 9, 2012

A Mother's Biggest Fear


We all have fears.  Some are big and some are little.  But there is one thing that I fear most.  A fear that would most likely break me.  A fear that has happened to another mother near by.

Yes, a mother lost her child this weekend and my heart has been breaking.

 I sit here trying to write about this and my eyes cannot stop flowing.  I know this mom.  And any of us could be her.  And it makes me want to hold onto each and every one of mine that much harder.  It could happen to anyone, at anytime, with no warning.

And then you think, what can I do??  What will make this better for the Mom??  Can anything help??  I don't know.  Do you??

I am one of those 'closet' mourners.  I don't express my feelings to others.  I keep it hidden and behind closed doors.  I am afraid to reach out for fear that I will lose it and begin to cry in front of those that are the ones who should be crying.  How does that make it better??  And so, I stay behind closed doors and mourn for them here.  I am a coward.  I know this.  I did this last year when someone else I know lost a baby during labor.  I hid here and cried for her and remembered my losses and cried some more.  And I just couldn't face it.  Yup...complete coward.

I couldn't even tell DJ about this b/c I couldn't stop crying.  Hubby had to step in and tell him.  Why tell DJ??  DJ is good friends with the little sister of the girl who died.  DJ should know what his friend is going through. DJ knows about death b/c my father died when he was 4.  He knows grandpa is in heaven and can see us always...even if DJ can't see him back.  I don't know what's going on in DJ's mind about it.  He took it in stride...but you could tell he was upset about the news.  And I know, in DJ style, he will ask questions randomly throughout the week.  He's not like me, though.  He probably wouldn't cry if he went to talk to his friend.  Thank goodness!!

In the event that you will need to talk to your child, I have a few links here (yeah, I probably should've looked these up before telling DJ...but didn't...we just blurted it out..oops)

http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Talking_About_Death_2/
http://childrenshospitalblog.org/talking-with-children-about-death/
http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/feelings/death.html

And so, I will end this with the following advice:  Hold those that are near and dear to you close, for you never know when you will lose them!!

We go through life so often
Not stopping to enjoy the day,
And we take each one for granted
As we travel on our way.

We never stop to measure
Anything we just might miss,
But if the wind should blow by softly
You'll feel an angel's kiss.

A kiss that is sent from Heaven
A kiss from up above,
A kiss that is very special
From someone that you love. 

For in your pain and sorrow
An angel's kiss will help you through,
This kiss is very private
For it is meant for only you. 

So when your hearts are heavy
And filled with tears and pain,
And no one can console you
Remember once again..... 

About the ones you grieve for
Because you sadly miss
And the gentle breeze you took for granted
Was just......... "an angel's kiss."
~Unknown

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Why Franny needs a crate...

Yes, you heard correctly.  My little sweet angel of a 23 mos. old could really use a crate (you know like the doggie crate)!!

Now, I'm just going to show you a few pics and you can tell me if you know what's all over the playroom (yes, I locked them in there so I could take a quick shower...never again!!):


And then this happened:
So, I had no other choice but to do this:
And she retaliated by doing this (yes, she's sleeping):
Now, you may think that's not so bad, right??  Yeah, tell me what all that white crap is and if you think it was wet or dry and I'll tell you how clean my playroom is right now!!  lol

The rest of the day was ok...unless you  think one of your kids throwing rocks and thus breaking windows is a perfect end to your already lovely day!!

And so, you will soon be reading about the following 2 subjects:
1. Toddlers vs. Puppies
2. 'If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you follow'

Don't forget to leave a comment telling me what you think that white stuff was... It was ALL OVER the room (not just what you see..and I'm sure I missed some somewhere in there)

PS- Doing Zumba during your FUN time of month is not recommended.  Zumba, absolutely... just be prepared for not know what's coming out while you are jumping around...  nothing embarrassing but lots of guessing going on...  great fun though!!  (TMI, I know...but get over it...!!!)

BTW- don't forget to cast your vote today...  So far, you have been the most amazing supporters!!  Thank You!!
http://www.circleofmoms.com/top25/Top-25-New-York-Moms-2012?trk=t25_Top-25-New-York-Moms-2012

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

AND away they go...

The first day of school has come and gone.  Everyone survived and everyone is in bed.  Whoo Hoo!!

This is my 'happy' dance just after they left on the bus... the bus that we almost missed on the very first day of school  (actually, I think we all almost missed it b/c she was about 9 minutes early... 9 minutes is a lot of time when you're trying to get kids up, fed, dressed, clean, packed and out the door...trust me, every nano second counts):
And then we had a lovely 'Franny Wrecker' of a day...
 - the war for the best real estate on top of mommy began as soon as we ran through thunderous downpours to get back in the house
- I think every piece of food I attempted to feed her today was either thrown on the floor, thrown back at me or chewed and spit out somewhere you are most likely to walk in it...
- I also think I really really need to get those clothes (remember her pile??  it's still there..lol) out of my living room so she'll stop going through them and trying on every pair of shoes that don't fit... AND,
- she now knows how to unscrew bottles (but at least my kitchen floor is now clean and at least it was only water today and not my butter flavoring(
- she also now thinks I am her personal play horse when I'm on my hands and knees picking up all the things she's thrown down there
- she pulled out every book on the bottom 2 book shelves today and laughed at me
- oh, and they ate pudding (this didn't get thrown on the floor or back at me...as you can see)
- um, and yeah, I recommend ducking at our dinner table as you might get hit with flying utensils and they kinda hurt when a toddler wings them at you...

Need I go on...  And so, I didn't  get a chance to miss the big kids too much today and my day went quickly.
 The bus came and went ...  and the big kids left Max in the dust... (check out his hand in the air, it's like, 'but, guys, what about me'... poor kid...

Kids comments on their teachers:
- DJ-  My teacher is AWESOME and SOOOOO COOOOOLL...  I'm already starting to like school this year

- Kyra- She's nice and I like her.

I guess we will see how the rest of the year goes...especially DJ's enthusiasm.  The kid was amazing after school today.  I let him have a small playdate after the bus and when he came back, instead of playing with everyone else outside:
- he came inside and emptied his backpack
- placed his lunch box on the counter next to the sink
- took out his homework and proceeded to do it  (math sheet and a q&a)
- talked incessantly to me about his day and his teacher and classmates
- took out his clarinet b/c he wanted to try it again
- fixed his mistakes on his homework with very little fuss
- AND, got him to read a few chapters of a new book we are trying out

UMMMMM, yeah, let's hope this keeps up!!  lol

If you have kids and they went back today, last week or are going tomorrow, hoping they had a good day and/or have a great day!!

And, of course, please don't forget to vote for my Blog on the Circle of Moms Top 25 NY Blogs.  Every vote counts and you guys have been absolutely amazing!!
http://www.circleofmoms.com/top25/Top-25-New-York-Moms-2012?trk=t25_Top-25-New-York-Moms-2012

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Back to School - a Top 10 List

Tomorrow I will be sending my 2 oldest kids back to school.  DJ will be heading off to 4th grade and Kyra will be in 3rd.  WOW... where has the time gone??  It feels like only yesterday DJ was coming home from the hospital..and than Kyra and now they are growing up so fast!!

The first day of school is always a bitter-sweet one for me.  I know some of you out there would love to have your kids with you all day long and don't want to let them go.  I, on the other hand, am kinda happy to let them go.  While I have 'enjoyed' having them home this summer, it will be nice for them to get out and for Max and Franny to have their space back.  There are lots of "he said she said's" and lots of instigating from big brother to little brother and lots of "Not Me did it and I don't know did it"  and kids up later (thus never getting that quiet Me time)  and ,  well,  you get the point, right??

So, in honor of them heading back onto that Big Yellow Bus, I've decided to dedicate a Top 10 List to them:)

Top 10 Things I will Miss When DJ & Kyra Go Back to School
1. Morning quiet time - I only got 30  minutes from when I woke up until Baby C arrived... but, it was my little piece of peace...  I usually get my quiet time after 10pm only

2. The use of their little legs and arms to go get me something in the other room b/c I'm too busy on FB to do it myself...lol...  ok, so not all the time..really...

3. Being able to send Franny outside in the backyard with Kyra so I can clean something inside...  yes, my floors have been cleaner than they've even been this summer

4. Having those extra hands from the big kids to get the little kids buckled into their seats...

5. They would take time to read books with the little ones... priceless moments

6. Lazy days of not getting dressed until noon or not at all and eating breakfast/lunch/dinner when we wanted to with no rushing involved

7. Having the time to actually bake with them this summer... they are usually in school or in bed when I bake

8. If I really needed a bathroom clean, I could get one of them to do it... he he he...

9. Being able to 'schedule' in that snuggle time more often b/c our schedule is not so hectic and they could stay up later

10. And last but not least, I will just miss them... really.  I often vent my frustrations about them in this blog, but I couldn't imagine my days without them... yes, even DJ who has a tendency to stomp on those last nerves!!

And so, back they go.  At least we will have until next week before all of our afterschool madness starts...  I predict several meltdowns and attitudes in the coming weeks!!  I most likely will not cry tomorrow but will instead be jumping for joy...  who knows.  It could go either way...it's that time where I cry for 3-5 days straight for no reason.  Don't misconstrue those tears in the morning as tears of sadness, but rather tears of joy!!

Keeping with the Top 10 List...here are 10 things I am looking forward to this school year:
1. DJ will be learning how to play the clarinet...  I know, how could I be looking forward to this you say??  Um, I LOVE the clarinet and played it myself so can't wait to see him do it
2. DJ will also be in the chorus for an actual chorus concert...
3. Kyra will be learning how to write cursive this year (even though she already thinks she can do it..)
4. DJ gets to go to his first 'dance' this year...really it's the Halloween Bash but it's at night and not in school
5. Nutcracker...seeing if both will be in it again and watching them perform..
6. Watching Kyra be able to take Jazz this year...she is sooooooo excited for this class
7. NOT having a kid make communion this year
8. Both of them being able to actually be in the Talent Show if they want to (past 2 years we have had communion 'retreat' on same night so we opted out of Talent Show)...  and even if they didn't want to do it, we can actually go watch it
9. Scheduled meals (kinda contradicts up top... but, they eat better when things are scheduled and pre-made and pre-thought about)
10. Watching them continue to grow and learn and become more and more of who they are (always love this...even when they are doing wrong and it drives me crazy but knowing they are learning a growing from it)

If you have kids going back...hope you have a great day tomorrow or the next.  If yours are already back, hope you are enjoying some peace and quiet:)

OK...on that happy note..ha ha...  just a quick reminder to vote again today if you haven't already done so... This blog is in the running for the Top 25 NY Blogs with Circle of Moms:)  You can vote every day (once every 24 hrs) So exciting to be in the running this year!!
http://www.circleofmoms.com/top25/Top-25-New-York-Moms-2012

Monday, September 3, 2012

Wow...and Thank You!!

First of all, I just need to say how amazing I think you guys all are!!  Your support has been awesome and I truly couldn't be happier knowing that my moments of insanity have you voting your hearts away!!

I was dumbfounded but so excited when I discovered my blog was nominated for the Top 25 Blogs of NY for Circle of Moms.  And I continue to glow and be amazed every single day that you are all voting.  AND, not only voting, but passing it forward!!  This truly is awesome and wonderful.  So, THANK YOU!!

Now, could you vote again today if you haven't already voted... ha ha ha...  Here's the link to my personal profile... just click on the thumbs up to vote...(only 10 more days of voting):
http://www.circleofmoms.com/blogger/honest-mommy?blogroll_id=74


Updates-

- 3 out of 4 children's closets and drawers have been emptied, sorted and re-stocked back in their rooms.  Give-aways are also in big, black garbage bags waiting to be taken away or driven somewhere to drop off:) The worst is yet to come, though...  For such a small child, Franny sure did have A LOT of clothes!!  and tights and bathing suits and bathing cover-ups and jackets and sweaters, yadda yadda yadda...you get the point... NOT looking forward to it:(  Do you see all this shit...um, I mean crap...oops, stuff???

1.The bins above the chalkboard are still full of last year's crap...  add it to the list tomorrow.  Must get done tomorrow.  
2.Book reports are finally done... I think... I have to find them all, count them and make sure they are filled out accordingly...  yeah, I know...do it as we go, right..  not my style.  I prefer to search the house in a maniacal style trying to find them all, proof-read them quickly and make them fix them all on the day before school starts!!
3.Go through school supplies to make sure we've got everything...
4.Must buy Kyra brown shoes so she will wear her 1st day of school outfit that we picked out.  Yup, she knows the rules with shoes and clothes already..  
5.Baked some Red Velvet cupcakes today...  gotta do some trials b/c I am making them for a wedding...  want one???  I'll see you one and you can give me feedback..lol... everyone seemed to really like the batch today...  weird and different kind of frosting though...
6. My kids just threw a fit b/c they can't finish watching the Bachelor Pad tonight... I know, I know...needed to start putting them to bed earlier a lot sooner than tonight... but, alas, this weekend has had lots of things going on... 

Think that's it.  Still contemplating making the teachers some little apple cookies and stuffing them in a mason jar with a back to school note on them...  guess I should really decide on that, huh??  Or at least make the cookie dough in case I go through with it..lol

Hope you are all having an awesome Labor Day!!  

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Back to School Organization

Going back to school also means trying to organize my house.  Go on, you can laugh.  I'm not laughing yet, but am struggling in this department...oh, and drinking heavily!!  ha ha

I have a chalkboard calendar on the wall (the actual calendar is painted on top of the chalkboard paint) and will be going back to filling it out...this is a must.

I also have bins for the 2 big kids right by the calendar for important info.  I need to trash everything from last year (I know, I know...I've had all summer to do this but haven't yet...probably find some of that important info I didn't know last year in them).  This is for things like book reports, projects, the math facts packet, field trip crap, etc.  Hubby has a bin too...for bills:)  Max is going to need one next year (oh no...my little snuggly buggly boy will be in the big K next year...think I will cry than).  I could use one...and Franny will eventually need one.  Gotta figure out something before everyone needs their own bins...

I'm trying to remember if they had a class on how to organize your house and your life once you have a husband and children...not ringing any bells... did you have one??  I kinda wish that I was more prepared for this whole wife/motherhood thing, you know??  I always know where things are and I am 99% positive when things are supposed to happen b/c it's all in my head.  Once you have a kid in school (or 2 and a preschooler and a husband and multiple jobs and many many activities) you kinda have to start writing this stuff down.  AND, you have to make sure it makes sense and the rest of the family knows about it.  Can you imagine when I have to add Franny to the mix??  I'm hoping to kick the shit out of organization by then...who's with me???

Now, if you've ever been in my house...you Might think I'm organized.  If you've ever been to a party at my house, you Might think I'm organized.  BUT...the painful truth is that I really am not all that organized.  What you don't see is my back room (the one I'm in right now...things are all over the floor, the daybed behind me and the desk...it's awful and drives my crazy).  That's where I shove everything so it's out of sight/out of mind when people are coming over.

This year...I am vowing to try and be a little bit better.  Yes folks, I am trying to organize my family.  Oh, yes, and get them ready for school.  And I decided to try and do all of this Today...and tomorrow...and Monday.  Wish me luck!!  I totally need it:)

On a more positive note- I have now gone through 3 out of 4 kids clothes.  Believe it or not, DJ took longer than Kyra.  He needed to try on every pair of pants and every shirt and fight me on why the floodwater pants are a NO and why the 'long-sleeve' shirts that are 3 inches up his arm or a NO... that kid just doesn't want to let go he' been in them for so long!!  On a surprising note, I found a bag in the boys' closet with about 20 pairs of 4T pants!!  Total score for Max and a lot less $$$$ for us to spend!!  Now on to the most painful b/c there are so many is Franny...the girl had lots and lots... hoping to be able to pass these on to someone.  Max's and Kyra's will be well used...not sure what I will do with DJ's yet but I have a ton of other crap (mine and Doug's and some random sheets/placemats/etc) that will go to Salvation Army.

Here are some pics of 1st Day Past...Remember when:)

DJ for Kindergarten (think those shorts still fit him..lol)

DJ 1st grade (check out the shorts..) and Kyra Kindergarten

DJ 2nd grade and Kyra 1st grade

DJ 3rd grade and Kyra 2nd grade
Hoping for a great school year for both!!

AND- just a wonderfully friendly reminder to vote for my Blog...you can click on the link below and it will take you directly to my page (click on the thumbs up to vote)... or click on the Circle of Moms Top 25 button on the top right of my blog and scroll down to Honest Mommy!!  Thanks for all of your support so far:)
http://www.circleofmoms.com/blogger/honest-mommy?blogroll_id=74