Now, to the Oh brother part.. Tonight I had to do a 'Cookie Decorating Demo' where they got to make and take some cookies. So, hubby had to step in and take the kids to their polish dance practice. And, if you all remember, I have to sit in the hall with Franny & Max b/c DJ's behavior pretty much sucks. I mean, let's be honest here about it. He doesn't listen, can't stop moving, does inappropriate things at inappropriate times and is rude and disrespectful. Not to mention, he doesn't try to do the dancing and makes it harder for everyone around him...teachers included. I don't think hubby was happy with any of them tonight. I know this b/c he stormed in the house followed by 3 kids (DJ, Kyra, Max) who were ordered straight up to their rooms. Yes, they came home and went to bed. And hubby had a beer and chilled out. Hmmmmm....now he might know what I deal with on a daily basis with these kids. Particularly DJ. Now, we all know that he's a little hyper and according to the information I've read on ADHD, he could be borderline in the area. And they say, that kids with this cannot help themselves. They have a hard time controlling things. And so, we try to be understanding and let certain things go. But, perhaps we've just lost control and need to rein him in again??? It's a constant battle of good behavior vs. bad behavior with him. Sometimes it is really hard to tell if this is normal or not. And, I am still hearing 'Oh, he's just a boy...he'll grow out of it'. But, I really know it's more than that. And I still struggle with how to deal with him...every day!!
His homework is not finished either. Because of his behavior hubby decided they all needed to go straight to bed. Needless to say, DJ did not follow his schedule for after school and did not finish it. Not that's another kick in the butt for him. He will have to finish it during recess tomorrow.
I think I need to stop saying 'Let's fix the DJ problem' and start saying 'Let's help DJ'...But, alas, I am still unsure how to do this.
And so, on top of DJ's horrific behavior tonight, Max didn't listen to hubby and Kyra didn't listen to hubby. And Franny...well, Franny is Franny and she's just being 1.5 and will continue to be a tough one to contain and keep occupied in a small space.
We decided to pull DJ from the Polish dancing. It breaks my heart b/c he cries when I threaten to take him out. But now, perhaps he will realize that he cannot behave the way he has been and get away with it?? The instructor thinks it might hurt his self-esteem by taking him out...but I'm thinking it will teach him that he needs to be serious about this stuff if he wants to do it. It's not a time for fooling around, picking your nose and complaining about doing the dance 1 more time. I'm not even sure I will be putting him in his dance classes in the fall either. He says he wants to do them and really gets upset when I tell him he can't...but...I just don't know. This is one of those parental decisions that will either benefit him or make him go to therapy and blame Me for everying...lol
And than, you think ' well, if I pull him from this activity shouldn't I pull him from his sports activities too??' Is it all too much for him to handle along with his school work. Or, am I going to go crazy with him home every single night with nothing to do??? I really love that he loves to dance. It's something we can share together. And if I take that away from him, am I taking away our 'special' time together away and one of our commonalities away?? I have a hard time communicating with him as it is... Yes, these are the things inside my head right now... honesty at it's best in the post!!
God Bless hubby for dealing with them tonight!!
It may be time to look into the medication and again talking to the doctor. He can't continue to be this way because it will make you crazy trying to find why DJ does what he does. Some of the things he does he knows what he is doing, but the fidgeting, concentration etc. that stuff he cannot help.
ReplyDeleteHomework, school and behavior should always come first, all of the other stuff is nonsense. As he gets older he's going to get worse. Put down everything else and tend to this issue.
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